Katrina Pity Party

CNN ran a segment this morning about a family who was displaced by Hurricane Katrina. It was a boiler plate human interest bit, complete with emotional scenes designed to invoke empathy in even the most stone-hearted viewer. Except it didn't work -- at least not on me.

I'm sick and tired of hearing the Katrina sob stories. There are a few simple truths about the situation that seem to have escaped the media, so I'll point them out here.

First, New Orleans is below the water line. When you build below the water, you accept a certain risk. Period. There is a reason why the insurance companies won't give you flood insurance -- the risks are too great.

It used to make me angry when people would live in the Mississippi flood plain and expect FEMA to bail them out year after year (pun intended). Why, I wondered, would people continue to move back in when they knew damn good and well it was going to flood again? Because they also knew FEMA would bail them out again, and they would get a new house and new stuff. They had plenty of incentive to stay, and none to leave.

Now take a look at this cross-section of New Orleans prepared by the Army Corps of Engineers. Notice anything peculiar?

Cross-section of New Orleans ground elevations.
(United States Army Corps of Engineers)

The whole damned city is under the water line!

As reported by the Washington Post in January, FEMA is now paying rental assistance to 685,635 families who were displaced by either Katrina or Rita.

President Bush is reportedly now seeking another $19.8 billion for the Katrina efforts. This is on top of the $10.5 billion approved in September, which was in addition to FEMA's normal budget for these types of things. So what we're really talking about is an additional $30.3 billion beyond normal budget.

At $30.3 billion, that works out to $44,192 for each household displaced by the storm. Since the cost of living can vary widely from place to place, you should note that the 2000 census recorded the per capita income for New Orleans as $17,258. That means that we're spending more than two and a half times the per capita income for each displaced family!

Okay, so we're blowing a wad of money. What does it mean to you? How about this: going by GAO estimates, that comes out to about $568 per taxpayer in the United States. For my family, that means this nonsense is costing me $1,136. There are a lot of things I could do with $1,136 that don't involve enabling people to get flooded again.

This money must be important, though. I'm sure these people are spending it wisely, right? Wrong. The GAO recently conducted several investigations into abuses. I'm sure everyone has heard the stories about FEMA debit cards being used for strip clubs, expensive purses, jewelry, and even a tattoo. We also know about people fraudulently receiving these cards. What I want to know is why isn't there more outrage about this?

Another thing that really boils my blood is the number of people who are now pulling an Oliver Twist. ("Please, sir, I want some more.") It has been nearly 6 months since Katrina. Six months is plenty of time rebuild your life.

In six months, you can start over from scratch with absolutely nothing, and build a decent little life for yourself. I know, because I've done it. Twice. All it takes is something a lot of these people know nothing about: hard work.

Living in the Moment

When I was a child, I once hypothesized to my mom that perhaps physical incarnation is static, and the human conscience merely passes from static moment to static moment. "If that's true", she told me, "then tomorrow's Ed is living in Las Vegas."

It turns out that tomorrow's Ed (which is now 20 years ago's Ed) didn't end up in Vegas until much later, but that's another story.

If you're having a hard time visualizing what I'm talking about, think of it like one of those little cartoon flip books -- each moment is fixed, and the only thing that changes is the page you're viewing. Collectively, moving from moment to moment in a flip book yields animation. Philosophically, your conscience moving from moment to moment equates to life.

If my original hypothesis is true, then arguably all time exist continuously in parallel -- past, present, and future. My body from 10 minutes ago is still eating a peanut-butter and jelly sandwich, while my conscience has moved on to the Ed that is writing this blog post. It's a tough concept to wrap your mind around, but it's quite fascinating if you can.

Anyone who has ever procrastinated can appreciate a small bit of this concept. How many times have you said "I'll worry about that later", and then when later comes, you're angry at yourself? How many times have regretted something you did earlier, or been grateful that "at least I didn't 'xyz'"? (Insert whatever is appropriate for "xyz".)

What will people think of this post? Will they think I'm crazy? Who cares? That's Tomorrow Ed's problem!

Shut Up and Be Quiet

I received an email from an old friend today. It was one of those classic forwarded messages that makes the rounds (I get these all the time). Normally, I simply deposit them neatly into the trash. This time, I decided to respond.

The original message read:

I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO THE FLAG, OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, AND TO THE REPUBLIC, FOR WHICH IT STANDS, ONE NATION UNDER GOD, INDIVISIBLE, WITH LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL!

I was asked to send this on if I agree or delete if I don't.

It is said that 86% of Americans believe in God.

Therefore I have a very hard time understanding why there is such a problem in having "In God! We Trust" on our money and having "God" in the Pledge of Allegiance.

Why don't we just tell the 14% to Shut Up and BE QUIET!!!

If you agree, pass this on, if not delete.

I AGREE !!!!

"God Bless America."

I carefully wrote a reply to all of the original recipients, and BCC'd everyone to protect their privacy. Here's what I had to say about it:

Why is it always so much easier to appeal to emotion rather than logic and reason?

If you're receiving this email, it's because you were included in the same original distribution that I was, or that I've added you because I thought you might take an interest and might want to pass this along. In any event, I've removed everybody's original email addresses and blind copied everyone in order to protect privacy.

If you didn't receive the original message, you may want to scroll to the end and read it before you continue. Suffice to say it was an inflammatory bit about the phrases "under God" and "in God we trust" that will no doubt enrage and incite people based upon emotional reaction. With this email, I seek to use logic and reasoning. If you're a bigot, a zealot, or just plain stupid, you might as well not read any further. You won't be able to comprehend the message anyway.

If, on the other hand, you want to know facts rather than conjecture, please read on, and let us begin our journey. You may not agree with my side of the issue, but at the end of this email, I promise you'll have a better understanding of the facts.

By now you may have realized that I respectfully disagree with the original author who so elegantly asserted, " Why don't we just tell the 14% to Shut Up and BE QUIET!!!" That said, I expect his or her viewpoint would be quite revered and admired in places like Saudi Arabia, Egypt, Palestine and Iran, whom all impose a state-sponsored religion. Nevertheless, since we're speaking of the United States, I'll limit my commentary to the issues here at home -- specifically, the original author's revulsion at the prospect of removing phrases that refer to God from the pledge and our national currency.

Arguments in favor of references to God range from academic ("we're preserving history") to belligerence ("we're a Christian nation so deal with it"). Unfortunately, statements made in support of these arguments are most often factually incorrect.

It is worth noting that the Pledge of Allegiance, originally written by Francis Bellamy in 1892, did not contain the phrase "under God". That phrase was added by Congress in 1954 after heavy lobbying by the Knights of Columbus during a time when professing a belief in a supreme being was synonymous with denouncing communism. (Full history of the pledge here: http://history.vineyard.net/pledge.htm) Thus, the historical argument is not valid -- at least in the case of the pledge. But what about the national motto?

Our national motto, as written by the framers (or "founding fathers", if you prefer), was the Latin phrase "E Pluribus Unum", which translates to "One from many" or "One from many parts". Unquestionably, "E Pluribus Unum" was a uniting phrase designed to showcase one of the strengths of America. As such, it accurately reflects the inclusive nature of our great country. This motto stood for almost 175 years until on July 30th, 1956, during the height of the Cold War and the McCarthy "communist witch hunt", the motto was changed to its current form: "In God We Trust". With one stroke of the pen, we undid more than a hundred years of history, ergo the historic preservation argument does not hold water for the national motto either. (Full history of the national motto here: http://www.religioustolerance.org/nat_mott.htm )

As for the religious majority cited by the original author, the exact numbers are relatively easy to find. Perhaps unsurprisingly, as of 2001, 76.5% of Americans self-identified their religious beliefs as falling under the umbrella of Christianity. The next highest category, with 13.2% was "Nonreligious/Secular". Judaism was third with 1.3%, and every other category gleaned less than 1%. (Source: http://www.adherents.com/rel_USA.html )

The latest study on the topic of religion's role in the United States, however, was published by The Pew Research Center in 2002 (complete study here: http://pewforum.org/publications/reports/poll2002.pdf).

Interestingly, even given the undeniably large majority enjoyed by Christianity, when asked "Can you be a good American without Religious faith?" fully 84% of the respondents said yes. Similarly, when asked "[Is] belief in God needed to be moral?" only 47% answered yes.

Thus, most Americans generally do not believe that professing a belief in "God" is a litmus test for patriotism, being a "good American", or even being moral.

Another thing I would point out is that the framers had ample opportunity to include references to God in the documents they drafted. It may surprise you to learn that the word "God" never appears in the United States Constitution - not in the original text, not in the Bill of Rights (the first 10 amendments), and not in any other amendment.

The closest the framers came to including God was in the Declaration of Independence. Everyone is familiar with the phrase "...endowed by their Creator...", which is remarkably neutral, but the word "God" actually does appear in the text. That states, even in the one instance when the word "God" was explicitly used, our framers did so tenuously, writing the phrase "...equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them,...".

Now, I'm neither a Theologian nor a Historian, but it seems to me that if our forefathers had intended this to be a "Christian Nation", they would have been a bit more explicit about it. What they intended, I believe, is to live and let live, and part of that means not telling a large segment of the population to simply "SHUT UP AND BE QUIET!!!" when you don't agree with them.

As for "why there is such a problem in having 'In God! We Trust' on our money and having 'God' in the Pledge of Allegiance" I would simply question why the original author thinks they should be there. Furthermore, would he or she tolerate professions of other religious viewpoints in public schools or on public currency? Would this author see a problem with "one nation under Goddess"? Would that be offensive to the author? How about you? Do you find that offensive? What about "one nation under No god"?

The whole point is that our government should neither be in the business of endorsing nor disclaiming religion.

Auctioning God

I had just responded to an email on the topic of religion today when I got to thinking. If I Googled for God, what would be the first site to come up? I decided to find out.

The search results themselves (totaling 480 million) were much as expected. Closer examination, however, revealed a wonderful little glitch with the Ad Sense algorithm. The top sponsored ad was for Ebay, with an ad that read "Looking for God? Find exactly what you want today www.eBay.com".

I never thought an online auction could be a religious experience.

Horrible Superbowl Performance

Am I the only one who noticed a horrible performance at the Superbowl yesterday? No, I'm not talking about the Sea Hawks, who lost to the Steelers. The disgusting display I speak of was the halftime show put on by the Rolling Stones.

Frankly, I found it a bit less entertaining than adding Exlax to the Metamucil in a Geriatric Ward, although I think the dancing and writhing displayed would be about on par with the resulting rush to the bathroom.

I was rather looking forward to seeing someone mention what an abysmal job they did, but this morning some idiot on CNN was raving about what a great performance it was. Come on, people! Am I the only one who can see that ship sailed 20 years ago? Frankly, I found it pathetic.

Comments, anyone?

GM Should Eat Its Own Dog Food

"Buy American." That's what U.S. car manufacturers have been telling us for years. "Ignore the price tag, the rapid depreciation, and the inferior quality, and support the good ol' U.S. of A! Keep those dollars in the country! Save American jobs!"

Outwardly, these companies appeal to our sense of patriotism. Inside the company, however, there seems to be a drastically different attitude. A glimpse of that attitude came to light today when General Motors announced that it will spend about $15 billion over the next 5 years outsourcing its Information Technology work.

Arguably, a generous portion of that work will continue to be done by Americans. Eight hundred million of those bucks (that's $800,000,000, or eight tenths of a billion dollars), however will go to two foreign companies: Cap Gemini, and Wipro.

Wipro Technologies, India's 3rd largest software exporter whose Website title reads "Offshore Outsourcing | IT Services", will get a $300 million piece of the pie. So what do you buy with $300 million? An article in the Hindu News Update Services described it this way:

"As part of the contract, Wipro would be providing application development and maintenance and data integration and migration services to GM."

Whew! I'm sure glad I don't know anyone who does "application development and maintenance". Hey! Wait a minute -- that's my job! So basically, GM wants me to buy their over-priced cars, and in exchange for this, they send my job to India. Outrageous!

How can GM expect people to "buy American" when the company itself doesn't practice what it preaches?

In fairness, GM isn't the only company who does this. Indeed, Wipro has quite an interesting customer list, including a number of "proud to be American" companies. Still, the automakers have been quite vocal in trying to dissuade consumers from purchasing the fruits of foreign labor. Hypocrisy in action. When will people learn?

An Open Letter to My Daughter

Dear [Daddy's Girl],

We spoke with your guidance counselor at school today, and although report cards don't officially come home until tomorrow, she confirmed what we suspected: you got perfect straight-A's. I cannot even begin to express how proud you make me.

I realize that you're taking advanced (GT) classes, and that you're even getting High School credit for some of your courses. To my way of thinking, that makes your 4.0 G.P.A. even more significant.

Although you may find this hard to believe, I can remember what it was to be 14. I know all too well the social pressures teens place on one another, and how frustrating it can be when you're no longer a child, but not quite an adult. That you're able to effectively manage those pressures and grab your own piece of success fills me with tremendous pride, and a certain sense of relief. I also think it foreshadows wonderful things in your future.

As you go forward, I'd like you to keep a few things in mind. Perhaps most importantly is that with precious few exceptions, the real value in education is not necessarily the material you learn. I'll let you in on a little secret: you really won't have to do any algebra when you're an adult. What's more, you'll probably never have to make anything out of poster board unless you're helping your own children with their silly little assignments.

No, the true value of education is not in the facts that you learn, but in the problem-solving skills that the learning process teaches you. It may sound cliche, but what school really teaches you is how to learn, how to seek new information, how to figure out which questions to ask, how to follow somebody else's rules - no matter how silly they might seem, and perhaps most importantly, how to make the most of any situation. These are the skills that are important for life, and proficiency in them is measured by the grades you receive. That you received perfect grades tells me that you've learned how to play the game we call life.

People often feel proud of their children because they believe they are directly responsible for any outstanding results. The simple truth, however, is that there are no schools to teach someone how to be a good parent. Figuring out what works and what doesn't is largely a question of trial and error.

With that in mind, it probably won't surprise to you find out that your father was a little nervous at the prospect of becoming a parent. Then, on the day you were born, I saw a sign hanging on the wall in the maternity ward. I don't remember the exact verbiage, but the message was clear: "If you're nervous because you've never had a baby before, don't worry - your baby has never had a parent before, either!"

While I would happily take credit for all of your successes, I don't think that would be fair. Was it that I taught you valuable life skills that are now key to your success, or was it more likely that you taught me how to be the parent you needed? Indeed, you broke nearly all my preconceived notions of parenting. For example, when you were little, I never really had to spank you. A stern look was all it took for you to understand my disappointment, and you always immediately corrected your behavior. It seemed that disappointing your father was more painful to you than any corporal punishment could have been.

Regardless of why you're successful, the simple truth is that you are, and I'm very proud of you. Keep up the great work!

Love Always,

Dad